Well, my first official grown-up relationship has ended. Though it is over, I really think I now know what I need in a relationship. There were many indicators that hinted that it wasn't a forever-guy, but the end is just as painful as expected. I need someone more on my level energy-wise, and someone a LOT more funny. I gave everything in this relationship, and I tried so hard for a long time to turn a blind eye to glaring issues that were not only hurtful, but something that should have sent off millions of warning signals in my head. I was ready for the ultimate relationship that ended with a stable family and children, and I never got the same impression from Jansport. I think there are many different types of relationships, and his was more of a casual dating type.

All in all, I'm glad it happened. It showed that I am capable of not only taking care of myself, but that I'm able to maintain a long-distance relationship; however, the thought of remaining friends with someone who breaks your heart is unthinkable.

I know now that I am worth everything that a man has to offer. I know that I only deserve the best from a significant other, because I bring a hell of a lot to the table. I feel like Jansport diminished some of my energy that I usually have, my spark was extinguished.

Something I can look forward to?
My brother's getting married and there are going to be TONS of eligible men;)

And I'm completely adorable, so it's perfect!
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I was accepted to the PhD program I was accepted to, so I am over the moon. In four years, I will be a doctor. I can't believe this enormous changes are all happening in my life right now, it's a crazy ride.

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This is a poem by Hafiz that was translated by Daniel Ladinsky that has really spoken to me...

SOME FILL WITH EACH GOOD RAIN

There are different wells within your heart
Some fill with each good rain,
Others are far too deep for that.

In one well
You have just a few precious cups of water,

That "love" is literally something of yourself,
It can grow as slow as a diamond
If it is lost.

Your love
Should nver be offered to the mouth of a
Stranger,

Only to someone
Who has the valor and daring
To cut pieces of their soul off with a knife

Then weave them into a blanket
To protect you.

There are different wells within us.
Some fill with each good rain,

Others are far, far too deep
For that.